Trigger Warning!
This world is a fucked-up, traumatizing, and hateful place. I live in this world, and so my words, experiences, and thoughts are birthed from within it. Further, it should come to no surprise that this blog will detail many of these fucked-up things in graphic detail. Fortunately, resilience is what I do, and I try my hardest to ferment inspiration from the darkest parts of my life. It's time to confront, it's time to resist, and of course... it's time to win.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

these are the things I know

I once carried the weight of the world on my shoulder. Damn! What an unbearable burden. Attempting to defy gravity, in this manner, I did not get very far. I ended up worst off, utterly squashed by the weight of the world and it's mass of problems.

Hero was a word I once strived toward. To save the day was my daily protocol. Damsels in distress were my favorite to love and caress. It took so damn long to finally realize that heroism is no better than hierarchal worshiping egotism. If Frued would have spent time on his own couch, his drug addicted narcissism would be the least shocking of his many disorders, hang ups, and shortcomings. Clark Kent is no more than a selfish, codependent, schizophrenic, delusional psychopath, and Superman, his fractured ego.

I have been misdiagnosed clinically sane by a death-craving culture and over-prescribed an insidious dose of reality. Majority rule does not work in mental institutions. Consensus reality seems more like delusional destitution when love is confused with abuse, experience with trauma, memories with nightmares, expectations with limitations, golden hearts with golden arches, daily commutes with death camp marches, and the drumline rolls on and on.

Leading by example is ultimately no more effective than authoritarian coercion. The battle will only be won in filling the empty stomachs of the world's most undesirables, in filling the hearts of the world's most apathetic, in filling the graves dug for the world's most wealthy and affluent. The best tasting apples come from those orchards bordering cemeteries. Poison oak is the frontline defense in areas of the forest most threatened. Worms have no brain but still regulate their own population growth based on resource availability. Substance, resistance, and sustainability can be inspired in the most unusual manner.

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